Unresolved Psychological Contracts
“If others tell us something we make assumptions, and if they don’t tell us something we make assumptions to fulfill our need to know and to replace the need to communicate.” ― Miguel Ruiz, Author, The Four Agreements A psychological contract is beliefs people...
Episode 11 – Living the Life You Want
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In my work with clients, I often hear people say, “how can I motivate this person to do what they’re supposed to? They’re lazy. They’re unmotivated.” The truth is people are always motivated. They’re just not always motivated to do what YOU want them to do.
In this episode, Judy and her guest, Tara Gregor, founder and CEO of Breakwell, a resource hub for holistic wellness discuss a very different and highly effective approach to motivation. Old models and external motivation tactics simply don’t work anymore. So, if those don’t work, what does? Tune in to this podcast to learn a new approach.
Is Your Free Will Actually Free?
“Free will, though it makes evil possible, is also the only thing that makes possible any love or goodness or joy worth having.” ~ C.S. Lewis Many people are aware of choices they make. What they don’t realize is that unconscious beliefs have also formed when they...
Are Your People High Performing?
“Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence wins championships.” Michael Jordan “You can motivate by fear, and you can motivate by reward. But both those methods are only temporary. The only lasting thing is self-motivation.” Homer Rice As a business leader, you...
Mentoring to Develop Your People
“Your most important task as a leader is to teach people how to think and ask the right questions so that the world doesn’t go to hell if you take a day off” Jeffrey Pfeffer In our culture transformation model, a key concept is ongoing monthly mentoring to...
Are My People Responsible Even When No One’s Watching?
“Integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is watching.” S. Lewis For years, I have been spitting in the soup of leaders using control models whether in homes, schools, community organizations or businesses. Engaging in control models is choosing...
Episode 7 – Game Changing Appreciative Inquiry
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Episode 2 – Are You a Puppet Or Powerful?
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The Path (Back) to Being Authentic
“Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string. Accept the place the divine providence has found for you, the society of your contemporaries, the connection of events. Great men have always done so, and confided themselves childlike to the genius of their...
It’s Never Too Late…To Create A Life You Love
“It is not always sunshine that splits the seed cleaving the armor, releasing the shoot. Darkness makes the heart’s case fragile. Pain breaks it open. Courage teases out the leaves and life unfurls and expands, thrusting upwards into light.” -Heidi Thomas, Call the...
Mentoring: Your Competitive Advantage
“The delicate balance of mentoring someone is not creating them in your own image, but giving them the opportunity to create themselves.” Steven Spielberg When we work in organizational culture change, our clients initially focus on the new concepts and tools in our...
Breaking the Addiction to Approval
“The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.” Friedrich Nietzsche Someone recently asked...
The Crucial Role of Honor, Dignity and Respect
“Do the best that you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” Maya Angelou All one has to do is turn on the news or get on social media to see that honoring oneself and one another and treating oneself and others with dignity and respect are...
Just Use Common Sense, Or Should You?
A woman was preparing a roast and as was her common practice she cut off both ends of it and threw them away. One day her husband asked, “Why do you always cut off the ends and throw them away?” to which she replied, “That’s how my mother always did it.” The man then...
Kinds Of People You Need
“A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities and an optimist is one who makes opportunities of his difficulties.” Harry Truman No matter what your role, you have an important mission and vision to fulfill at both work and home. You also...
Advantages of Cross-Functional Teamwork
One of the biggest challenges leaders face, according to Deloitte, is organizational design. Specifically, redesigning their structures through teams. The line and block hierarchy found on a company org chart isn’t how work actually gets accomplished. Let’s face it,...
Intention Equals Results
“The truth is incontrovertible. Panic may resent it, ignorance may deride it, malice may distort it, but there it is.” Winston Churchill Intention is a function of our minds and is a causal activity. In other words, whether we use our minds consciously or...
How Do You Know?
“When the student is ready the teacher appears. When the question is asked then the answer is heard. When we are truly ready to receive then what we need will become available.” John Gray, Author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus One of my favorite movies is...
When Winning Turns Into Losing
“How tricky is this ego that it would tempt us with a promise of something we already possess.” Jim Carrey My daughter, a practicing attorney, was recently offered a great job in a small boutique law firm and was enjoying the process of getting to know the staff,...
Right Under My Nose
“Developing an awareness of life beyond your immediate surroundings brings a healthy restlessness which, if infused with peace and used well, can be a foundation for positive change in the world.” Dadi Janki, Brahmakumaris Chief Auto-Pilot: Operating In A Blind...
Become the Best Version of YOU!
“The actual processes of individuation—the conscious coming-to-terms with one’s own inner center (psychic nucleus) or Self—generally begins with a wounding of the personality and the suffering that accompanies it. This initial shock amounts to a sort of a...
Become the Hero You’ve Been Waiting For
“True heroism is remarkably sober, very undramatic. It is not the urge to surpass all others at whatever cost, but the urge to serve others at whatever cost.” Arthur Ashe Too many people stubbornly believe it’s necessary and justifiable to use...
Get More Selfish!
“Whether you believe it a moral imperative or enlightened self-interest, securing the conditions that will lead to a healthy, prosperous future for everyone is a goal I believe we all share.” Bill Gates We are often appalled by selfish people. They grasp...
Motivation From The Inside Out
“Motivation is the art of getting people to do what you want them to because THEY want to do it.” Dwight D. Eisenhower For centuries as a people, we have opted to use control measures such as command-and-control management (eliciting fear and...
Culture Eclipses Strategy But Purpose Eclipses Everything
“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.” ― Friedrich Nietzsche “The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson...
Who Says You’re Not Like The Dalai Lama!?
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate… Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.” Nelson Mandela How is it that we often forget our true glorious nature and cling to the weakest view of our self instead? It is as if we have these...
Leader-Follower Agility Is Crucial
“Innovation is key. Only those who have the agility to change with the market and innovate quickly will survive.” Robert Kiyosaki “Success today requires the agility and drive to constantly rethink, reinvigorate, react, and reinvent.” Bill Gates Change is happening...
Is My Business Agile?
“I submit that there must be a commitment to, practice of, and execution of professional common behaviors and the presence of highly communicated standardized organizational expectations – without which there are no supports upon which the Agile/SAFe bar can be...
What’s Love Got to Do With It?
Whether we want to associate love with our businesses or not, the presence of love or the lack of it, plays a powerful role in our ROI. It affects our profitability, health, employee engagement, teamwork, customer satisfaction; all of what makes a business successful....
Do You (Really) Believe in Win/Win?
“Lead the life that will make you kindly and friendly to everyone, and you will be surprised what a happy life you will lead.” Charles M. Schwab When most people are asked if they believe in and want win/win, they answer with the obvious, “yes.” The challenge is that...
Walking the Talk
“It is difficult to inspire others to accomplish what you haven’t been willing to try.” Confucius “It is my responsibility to do what inspires me, in order to inspire others to do what inspires them.” Tsepiso Makhubedu The holidays are a time we gather...
Are you Strategically Aligned?
“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” Henry David Thoreau What many business owners fail to realize is that if employees...
Are You Free To Access Your Wisdom?
Most people are less able to access their wisdom than they know. And that’s because they are in survival mode more than they know. We experience various degrees of survival whenever we are triggered, reactive and experiencing our critter state, that part of our mind...
Help People Conceive, Believe, & Achieve
The difference between an idea and a commitment is the difference between knowing about a new tool and using it in your everyday life as a new habit and way of operating. The greatest challenge many of my clients encounter as they improve their workplace culture is to...
What do you Intend to Cause?
“Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.” Albert Einstein When I work with businesses, organizations, families, and individuals, people are usually confused by this question: What do you intend to cause? It’s as if the idea...
Creating a Life YOU Love
“Selfishness is a virtue, unless you think it must come at the expense of others. And why would anyone think that? Oh yeah, that’s what all the people who don’t “get it” told you.” Mike Dooley My purpose is to cause conditions in...
Part 2 of 5 – Human Systems – What Gets Measured Improves
“I have been struck again and again by how important measurement is to improving the human condition.” Bill Gates What Gets Measured Improves Motivated, successful, and contributing. That’s what you need your staff to be to achieve your goals and provide...
Get Along. Get Inspired. Get Results.
“Before one can hit a grand-slam home run, it first requires singles, doubles or triples.” Unknown Every business owner sets up their organization with high hopes and a dream of making a difference, yet all the great ideas and intentions to provide quality...
Your Blueprint for Constructing Success
“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” – Henry David...
Being Trustworthy Isn’t Building Trust
“Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.” Stephen R. Covey I teach and consult on the importance of the following eight values that build trust: honesty,...
From Compliance to Commitment
“You get the best efforts from others not by lighting a fire beneath them, but by building a fire within.” -Bob Nelson Compliance People used to think of the workplace in terms of the activities and behaviors that employees needed to perform well....
2. Honesty: Don’t Play Others, Don’t Play You!
“When you face a choice between being polite and being honest, err on the side of the truth. It’s better to be disliked but respected than to be liked and disrespected. In the long run, the people we trust the most are those who have the courage to be sincere.” Adam...
5. Respect: Valuing Unconditionally
“Respect yourself and others will respect you.” ― Confucius This article on respect is the seventh in my series on the eight values that build trust. I always pair the word respect with mutual because one is not possible without the other. In my work with...
6. Recognition: Why is Recognition Important To Trust?
“If you could only sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to the people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.” Fred Rogers I have been...
8. Seeking Excellence: Are You All You Can Be?
“Excellence is never an accident. It is always the result of high intention, sincere effort, and intelligent execution; it represents the wise choice of many alternatives – choice, not chance, determines your destiny.” Aristotle Seeking excellence...
7. Follow-Through: Do I Mean What I Say?
“Intent without action will leave every word that I use to describe my intent as empty and best never said.” Craig D. Lounsbrough Imagine you ask someone to do something and they agree. You count on it, and then come to find they didn’t do it. How are you...
Are You Cultivating Excellence?
National research shows 29% of employees are engaged in excellence. They’re eager, willing, and personally responsible. The remaining 71% are mediocre or actively disengaged… Ghandi, Helen Keller, DaVinci, or simply a neighbor, friend or relative with qualities...
Why Are You Here?
“Believe in your heart that you’re meant to live a life full of passion, purpose, magic and miracles.” Roy T. Bennett, Author, The Light in the Heart You’re challenged by a co-worker, client, friend or child; you’re up against physical, social, financial...
Kinds of People I Need
“A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities and an optimist is one who makes opportunities of his difficulties.” Harry Truman An important question to consider is, “What kinds of people do I need and want to achieve my mission and...
Courage to be Imperfect
“Those who have a strong sense of love and belonging have the courage to be imperfect.” Brené Brown Why are we the most addicted, medicated, overweight, and indebted society in history? Brene Brown, researcher, author and speaker on vulnerability, worthiness...
Are We Compatible?
Whether in business or personal relationships, a worthwhile question to ponder is what constitutes compatibility? I went to a lecture by Dr. Denbo, a local therapist, who posed this question. Most of the crowd said things like, “Common values,” “Common interests,” and...
Soul Mates
Like many of you, I’ve always wanted a soul mate – that wonderful partner who in their presence makes me feel connected and whole. The one who really gets me and who’s there for me through thick and thin, for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in...
Can a Team-Hater Engage Employees?
by Julia Paulus (referencing Judy Ryan and LifeWork Systems) SBM, March 2010 I don’t like teams. Back in school, I hated classes when we had to do group projects. My group was always the one where a couple of people did nothing and still got the grade. The same...
Wake up Tickled and Inspired!
“Are you ready to be wildly successful while supporting the same in others? if so… what are you waiting for?” Now’s the time to take these steps so you too awaken tickled and inspired… One of my most significant experiences in 2009 included participating...
Game-Changing Appreciative Inquiry
Imagine two scenarios both involving a couple struggling in their relationship and seeking marriage counseling. In the first instance, the couple is asked questions centering on their problems, including their origin and possible solutions. While this traditional...
What Does it Take to Build Trust?
I’ve delivered many team building workshops to corporations, schools and parent groups in which I focus on the behaviors that build trust and those that don’t. One behavior destructive to any team is gossip and part of my program is an invitation to enter a mind trust...
Connect to Your Light!
Recently, I took a self-imposed retreat to discover how to more fully operate from freedom, courage and joy. As women, unless the light of love is flowing fully in our family or in our intimate relationships, we’re not fulfilled because loving relationships are our...
Keep The End In Mind
In any situation in which you are uncertain, the first thing to consider very simply is, “What do I want to come of this? What is it for?” The clarification of the goal belongs at the beginning of any course of action because the goal is what will determine the...
Pause, Breathe and Check In
Thich Nhat Hahn, a well- known author and Buddhist monk says we are reluctant to visit the home of our self because we are loath to face the pain, sadness and fear we might encounter there. It’s true those emotions are often present. He also says that if we...
I Want. What Will I Do?
What do I want and what am I willing to do? These are powerful questions that make up the internal dialog of those who have embraced intrinsic motivation; the process of identifying and expressing what one most loves. These are questions of courage, exploration and...
What & Why Emotional Intelligence
We hear a lot of buzz these days about the importance of emotional intelligence (EI). What exactly is “emotional intelligence” and why do we need it? There are 4 main components: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness and relationship management....
Commitment
“The moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves, too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and...
Vision is Everything
“By failing to prepare you are preparing to fail.” Benjamin Franklin It’s becoming more popular to talk about the power of our vision and the role it plays in creating extraordinary outcomes in our personal and professional lives. Physicists have proven that...
What You Look For You Will Find
One of the great benefits and challenges of growing up is choice – consciously exercising it that is! We are always choosing, we just don’t always ask ourselves what, how and why we are choosing. Our focus makes all the difference. I had a huge aha experience...
Organized Chaos on Purpose
As a child deeply in love with nature, living on the edge of a park, and the 5th child of 6, I knew a lot about chaos, the beautiful, free, creative and exhilarating kind. Starting out free to explore, school at age 5 felt like bitter confinement and at times crushing...
Did You Hear What I Meant to Say?
Have you ever thought you had an agreement or understanding with someone only to find you didn’t? You thought you were clear and direct in a request, and ended up disappointed. Or have you responded to a request, only to find someone frustrated with you? Could it be...
Connection: From Chaos to Community
Connection is to humans what water is to fish; a key to our existence and a cornerstone for our behavior. We are social beings and from infancy we make decisions and set goals in response to our social framework. In community, we make interpretations, then decisions...