Is Your Workplace Psychologically Safe?

Is Your Workplace Psychologically Safe?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“In general, only a child who feels safe dares to grow forward healthily. His safety needs must be gratified. He can’t be pushed ahead, because the ungratified safety needs will remain forever underground, always calling for...
Devil’s Advocate and Brutal Honesty

Devil’s Advocate and Brutal Honesty

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Never play the Devil’s Advocate. Your words could be the difference between success and failure in someone else.” Ingrid Weir Too often I hear people say, “I’m going to play Devil’s advocate now” to which I quickly reply, “Please...
When You Can’t Help or Fix A Relationship

When You Can’t Help or Fix A Relationship

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinDon’t blame a clown for acting like a clown. Ask yourself why you keep going to the circus. ~ Unknown Sometimes we keep going to the circus because we don’t realize that’s where we are. Someone recently asked, “what...
The Courage To Be Disliked

The Courage To Be Disliked

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“When we least expect it, life sets up a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will...
Disengagement is Betrayal

Disengagement is Betrayal

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,...
Inadequacy: I Can’t, So Leave Me Alone!

Inadequacy: I Can’t, So Leave Me Alone!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinEver know a person who feels like the human version of Eeyore? They assume “I can’t” and refuse to try. Their behavior communicates, “Just leave me alone”. They look and act pathetic. They embody “poor me.” They’re stuck in a...
Choose Helpful AND Harmless

Choose Helpful AND Harmless

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“It always seems impossible until it is done”Nelson Mandela I often reflect on how many people are “checked out” at work, home, and school; they are suffering and barely surviving, rather than overcoming and thriving....
Transforming Discouragement

Transforming Discouragement

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Inferiority feelings rule the mental life and can be clearly recognized in the sense of deficiency and dissatisfaction, and in uninterrupted struggles both within individuals and humanity.”Alfred Adler, Psychiatrist, 1870-1937 The...
Cover Story: Me Too: Unwrapping Abuse Systems

Cover Story: Me Too: Unwrapping Abuse Systems

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“An insight the size of a mustard seed is powerful enough to bring down a mountain-sized illusion that may be holding our lives together. Truth strikes without mercy. We fear our intuitions because we fear the transformational...
The Preponderance of Neglect

The Preponderance of Neglect

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinMost organizations don’t fall apart as a result of one big blow. Most relationships don’t end because of one grand argument. Most lives don’t fall to pieces due to one sad event. No, I suggest to you that sustained failure happens...
What Does “I’m Right; You’re Wrong” Cost?

What Does “I’m Right; You’re Wrong” Cost?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Remember, we see the world not as it is but as we are. Most of us see through the eyes of our fears and our limiting beliefs and our false assumptions.” Robin S. Sharma “Don’t Make Assumptions. Find the courage to ask...
You Make Sense & Deserve Compassion

You Make Sense & Deserve Compassion

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinEveryone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always. Unknown What if you knew every reaction (and even what you fear are over-reactions) you experience is based on legitimate reasons and deserves caring...
It Feels Real: Am I Being Punished?

It Feels Real: Am I Being Punished?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Children are great observers but poor interpreters.” Rudolf Dreikurs, parent educator, author and psychologist Why this feeling?When we were children, one of the ways we could create the illusion life was not careening out of...
What You Protect, You Make Weak – Empowering vs. Enabling

What You Protect, You Make Weak – Empowering vs. Enabling

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinRule of Empowerment: “Don’t do for others anything they can do for themselves.  Don’t say anything they already know.” In order for people to live to highest potential, each has four core needs; to feel empowered,...
Shifting From Victim to Victor

Shifting From Victim to Victor

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinI have always been drawn to unorthodox methods for forming authentic community and developing people into good citizens. In the last thirty years I have turned that interest into an obsession and a company.  Here are key...
You’re Not The Boss of Me!

You’re Not The Boss of Me!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinA man I know refuses to wear his safety belt because he doesn’t want to be controlled by the government. I know many such people. He admits it’s insane. And I recognize his mindset; like me, he’s often living from reaction to...
Redirecting Negative Behavior

Redirecting Negative Behavior

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“A misbehaving person is a discouraged person.” ~ Dr. Rudulf Dreikurs Are you challenged by poor behavior? Could it be discouragement despite appearances? What thoughts do you think, words do you say to and about them, and what...
8. Seeking Excellence: Are You All You Can Be?

8. Seeking Excellence: Are You All You Can Be?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinSeeking excellence builds trust because it indicates a person’s level of self-management. Whether we realize it or not, we gain or lose trust in and with others based on their commitment to mediocrity or excellence… Seeking...
How Do I Deal With That Annoying Person?

How Do I Deal With That Annoying Person?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinYou know that person who cracks a joke at an inopportune moment? Taps their pen on the conference room desk? Stands at your door while you’re on the phone or otherwise annoys and irritates you? I was mentoring a Manager named Maggie...
Why Are You So Mean?

Why Are You So Mean?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinWhat Did I Do To Deserve that?! You know those times when out of the blue, someone does or says something that shocks and hurts you? In that moment, you’re encountering the goal of revenge, a mistaken goal of misbehavior in which a...
The Dysfunctional Bunch

The Dysfunctional Bunch

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinIn a perfect world, employees would arrive at work on time and perform exactly what is in their job description. Well, maybe they would do just above what is expected in their job description. And, on occasion, perform some...
Who Do You Think You Are?!

Who Do You Think You Are?!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinEver encounter those people you feel like asking, “Who died and made you God?” You resist supporting them, thinking and saying anything nice about or to them and even if you don’t generally gossip, they’re the ones you’re most...
How to Emotionally Handle Terminations

How to Emotionally Handle Terminations

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinby Julia Paulus (referencing Judy Ryan and LifeWork Systems) SBM, March 2010 Getting fired is obviously difficult for an employee. But firing someone is also hard for owners and managers – probably one of the hardest things they...
What Does it Take to Build Trust?

What Does it Take to Build Trust?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinI’ve delivered many team building workshops to corporations, schools and parent groups in which I focus on the behaviors that build trust and those that don’t. One behavior destructive to any team is gossip and part of my program is...
The Biggest Loser

The Biggest Loser

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinThe show “The Biggest Loser” is very popular. In it we see men and women who are determined to make monumental changes and are willing to embrace new habits and significant personal discomfort to do so. When I recently...
No I Won’t, You Can’t Make Me!

No I Won’t, You Can’t Make Me!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinPower Struggles: Opportunities for Connection Yes, we all know what it is to be in a power struggle, whether it’s with a parent, child, spouse, lover, friend or co-worker. Power struggles are fraught with tension, anger...
Dismantling Bullying Systems

Dismantling Bullying Systems

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin(The story in this article may be an example involving students, but the message for the workplace is just as relevant) “As long as victims and bullies see themselves in diametrically opposed...