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Why Servant Leadership Can Sometimes Be Top Down

Why Servant Leadership Can Sometimes Be Top Down

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“The goal of many leaders is to get people to think more highly of the leader. The goal of a great leader is to help people to think more highly of themselves.” ― J. Carla Nortcutt, Professor   When it comes to being human, no...
Can Love Be Here Too?

Can Love Be Here Too?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we’ll ever do.” —Brené Brown As I work with clients on their personal and professional development or help friends and family who are working...
A Time To Rise Up!

A Time To Rise Up!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“She was fire and life. She was awe and starlight.” ― Nadine Brandes, Author, Fawkes “O my Courageous Sister! You have to become the beacon of hope for all women around you and then for the whole society.” ― Abhijit Naskar,...
The Path (Back) to Being Authentic

The Path (Back) to Being Authentic

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string. Accept the place the divine providence has found for you, the society of your contemporaries, the connection of events. Great men have always done so, and confided themselves...
It’s Never Too Late…To Create A Life You Love

It’s Never Too Late…To Create A Life You Love

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“It is not always sunshine that splits the seed cleaving the armor, releasing the shoot. Darkness makes the heart’s case fragile. Pain breaks it open. Courage teases out the leaves and life unfurls and expands, thrusting upwards...
Is Love More Powerful Than Hate?

Is Love More Powerful Than Hate?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“You are a child of God. You’re playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.”                          Marianne Williamson I often...
Breaking the Addiction to Approval

Breaking the Addiction to Approval

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.”...
Devil’s Advocate and Brutal Honesty

Devil’s Advocate and Brutal Honesty

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Never play the Devil’s Advocate. Your words could be the difference between success and failure in someone else.”  Ingrid Weir Too often I hear people say, “I’m going to play Devil’s advocate now” to which I quickly reply, “Please...
When You Can’t Help or Fix A Relationship

When You Can’t Help or Fix A Relationship

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinDon’t blame a clown for acting like a clown. Ask yourself why you keep going to the circus. ~ Unknown Sometimes we keep going to the circus because we don’t realize that’s where we are. Someone recently asked, “what...
Meeting Our Needs and Those Of Others

Meeting Our Needs and Those Of Others

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinOur Basic Social Needs: Belonging and Significance Beyond basic survival, we all want to experience a healthy sense of belonging and significance through our four core social needs: to  feel powerful, lovable, connected and...
Your Secret Weapon: Informal Influencers

Your Secret Weapon: Informal Influencers

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinTo get these influencers to model the desired behaviour, you need their buy-in. Gather them together for a closed-door session and explain why their role is crucial. Often, it just takes an open conversation to help them understand...
If Not Punishment, Then What?

If Not Punishment, Then What?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinToxic Shame is a neurotic, irrational feeling of worthlessness, humiliation, self-loathing and paralyzing feeling that has been inflicted onto an individual through repeated, traumatic experiences often, but not always, rooted in...
How Do You Know?

How Do You Know?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinOne of my favorite movies is called How do You Know? (starring Reese Witherspoon, Paul Rudd, Jack Nicholson, and Owen Wilson). It’s funny, romantic and very thought-provoking. Reese Witherspoon plays Lisa, a young 30-something that...
When Winning Turns Into Losing

When Winning Turns Into Losing

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“How tricky is this ego that it would tempt us with a promise of something we already possess.” Jim Carrey My daughter, a practicing attorney, was recently offered a great job in a small boutique law firm and was enjoying the...
Emotional Presence: It’s Good Business!

Emotional Presence: It’s Good Business!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“The affairs of the heart are directly connected to the brain and it’s theheart’s natural intelligence that must be unfolded for the brain to operate with greater efficiency.”         Magical Child, Joseph...
Loved AND Lovable

Loved AND Lovable

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”   Elizabeth Appell In my work, I help people take the risk to blossom. I tell business leaders, employees,...
Be Your Most Imaginal Self!

Be Your Most Imaginal Self!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.” Proverb Consider the following ellipses from the books “Butterfly,” by Norie Huddle, and “Waking the Global Heart,” by Anodea Judith. Caterpillars are...
The Education Of Our Children

The Education Of Our Children

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Consider the kingdom you have made and judge its worth fairly. Is it worthy of a child of God? Does it protect his peace and shine love upon him? Does it keep his heart untouched by fear and allow him to give always, without any...
Men & Women Leading Together

Men & Women Leading Together

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“In the end, what will hurt the most is not the words of our enemies but the silence of our friends.”     Martin Luther King, Jr. I sent a TED talk to a male friend, entitled Violence Against Women; it’s a Men’s...
The Need for Patience & Reassurance

The Need for Patience & Reassurance

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“It’s not our job to play judge and jury, to determine who is worthy of our kindness and who is not. We just need to be kind, unconditionally and without ulterior motive, even – or rather, especially – when...
Cover Story: Me Too: Unwrapping Abuse Systems

Cover Story: Me Too: Unwrapping Abuse Systems

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“An insight the size of a mustard seed is powerful enough to bring down a mountain-sized illusion that may be holding our lives together. Truth strikes without mercy. We fear our intuitions because we fear the transformational...
Choose You

Choose You

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Most men (and women) lead lives of quiet desperation and die with their song still inside them.” Henry David Thoreau It’s difficult for many people, especially women, to choose themselves in their own lives and then they lead lives...
Life Is Calling YOU!

Life Is Calling YOU!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“You are braver than you think, more talented than you realize.” R. Bennett I watched a documentary on the pyramids recently and learned something that made me hopeful while confirming what I have already felt intuitively. Despite...
“I’m Sorry You Feel That Way” – “I Never Intended That…”

“I’m Sorry You Feel That Way” – “I Never Intended That…”

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“If you own the story you get to write the ending.” Brene Brown   “We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility for our future.” George Bernard Shaw Why It’s Never Helpful to Say, “I’m Sorry...
What’s Love Got to Do With It?

What’s Love Got to Do With It?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinWhether we want to associate love with our businesses or not, the presence of love or the lack of it, plays a powerful role in our ROI. It affects our profitability, health, employee engagement, teamwork, customer satisfaction; all...
You Make Sense & Deserve Compassion

You Make Sense & Deserve Compassion

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinEveryone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always.   Unknown What if you knew every reaction (and even what you fear are over-reactions) you experience is based on legitimate reasons and deserves...
Conducting Business From The Heart

Conducting Business From The Heart

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinWhen I speak of heart in this article, I am referring specifically to our heart’s purpose, inspired from within, deeply stirring us, leading us to take actions that matter most to us. In my work with clients, I find that many don’t...
Are You Feeling Merry or Blocking Your Joy?

Are You Feeling Merry or Blocking Your Joy?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Joy is the most vulnerable emotion we experience. In fact, addiction research shows us that an intensely positive experience is as likely to cause relapse as an intensely painful experience.”Brene Brown, Author and...
Power Over? Power Under? Power Within!

Power Over? Power Under? Power Within!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart.” Nelson Mandela   I was born and raised in Ferguson, MO and recent events there have...
Building Caring Connections

Building Caring Connections

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Nobody cares how much you know, until they know how much you care.”   Theodore Roosevelt “Caring about others, running the risk of feeling, and leaving an impact on people, brings happiness.”    Harold Kushner   I frequently...
A Happy Community Works, Plays, & Serves Together

A Happy Community Works, Plays, & Serves Together

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinA Happy Community Works, Plays, & Serves. Leaders determine the happiness of their workplace community. When you think of a happy community, you likely picture good team players that pitch in, are positive and manage themselves...
What You Protect, You Make Weak – Empowering vs. Enabling

What You Protect, You Make Weak – Empowering vs. Enabling

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinRule of Empowerment: “Don’t do for others anything they can do for themselves.  Don’t say anything they already know.” Rudolf Dreikurs In order for people to live to highest potential, each has four core needs; to feel...
Key to Your Joy: Honor Your Sensitivity

Key to Your Joy: Honor Your Sensitivity

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“To feel intensely is not a symptom of weakness…Highly sensitive people are too often perceived as weaklings or damaged goods. To feel intensely is not a symptom of weakness, it is the trademark of the truly alive and...
Creating a Life YOU Love

Creating a Life YOU Love

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Selfishness is a virtue, unless you think it must come at the expense of others. And why would anyone think that? Oh yeah, that’s what all the people who don’t “get it” told you.”  Mike Dooley  ...
It Takes a Village

It Takes a Village

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Everybody in a village had a role to play in bringing up a child—and cherishing it—and in return that child would in due course feel responsible for everybody in that village. That is what makes life in society possible. We must...
1. Straightforwardness: Dare I Tell it Like It Is?

1. Straightforwardness: Dare I Tell it Like It Is?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinThe most important relationship to manage is with our self. A trustworthy person practices honesty, straightforwardness, respect, receptivity, recognition, keeping commitments, seeking excellence and disclosure, the eight values...
3. Receptivity: Are You Receptive?

3. Receptivity: Are You Receptive?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Receptivity and sensitiveness are what makes one’s behavior endearing and enriching. Do not try to thrust your likes and dislikes on others. Try instead, to find out what those around would expect from you and where you can...
5. Respect: Valuing Unconditionally

5. Respect: Valuing Unconditionally

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinRespect is making the needs, perspectives and feelings of others as important as your own. A win/lose dynamic has gone on for many years and still continues today. Evidence of this shows up in our relationships between unions and...
8. Seeking Excellence: Are You All You Can Be?

8. Seeking Excellence: Are You All You Can Be?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Excellence is never an accident. It is always the result of high intention, sincere effort, and intelligent execution; it represents the wise choice of many alternatives – choice, not chance, determines your destiny.”     ...
Why Are You Here?

Why Are You Here?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Believe in your heart that you’re meant to live a life full of passion, purpose, magic and miracles.” Roy T. Bennett, Author, The Light in the Heart   You’re challenged by a co-worker, client, friend or child; you’re up...
Reasons We Gossip & What To Do Instead

Reasons We Gossip & What To Do Instead

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“How would your life be different if…You walked away from gossip and verbal defamation? Let today be the day…You speak only the good you know of other people and encourage others to do the same.” Steve Maraboli, Author, Life, the...
Why Are You So Mean?

Why Are You So Mean?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“People are not mean to us because they don’t like us, but because they don’t like themselves.” Jodi Aman What Did I Do To Deserve that?! You know those times when out of the blue, someone does or says something that shocks and...
Courage to be Imperfect

Courage to be Imperfect

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“Those who have a strong sense of love and belonging have the courage to be imperfect.” Brené Brown   Why are we the most addicted, medicated, overweight, and indebted society in history? Brene Brown, researcher, author and...
Who Do You Think You Are?!

Who Do You Think You Are?!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinEver encounter those people you feel like asking, “Who died and made you God?” You resist supporting them, thinking and saying anything nice about or to them and even if you don’t generally gossip, they’re the ones you’re most...
Are We Compatible?

Are We Compatible?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinWhether in business or personal relationships, a worthwhile question to ponder is what constitutes compatibility? I went to a lecture by Dr. Denbo, a local therapist, who posed this question. Most of the crowd said things like,...
Soul Mates

Soul Mates

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinLike many of you, I’ve always wanted a soul mate – that wonderful partner who in their presence makes me feel connected and whole. The one who really gets me and who’s there for me through thick and thin, for better or worse, richer...
Better to Give Than Receive?

Better to Give Than Receive?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinWe often hear the phrase, “It’s better to give than receive” but is it true? The truth is, it just feels safer to give. Without equal ability to receive, a relationship is defined and limited by a certain amount of fear and...
Connect to Your Light!

Connect to Your Light!

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinRecently, I took a self-imposed retreat to discover how to more fully operate from freedom, courage and joy. As women, unless the light of love is flowing fully in our family or in our intimate relationships, we’re not fulfilled...
Shift Enemies To Friends

Shift Enemies To Friends

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinHave you ever met someone you felt completely in sync with? Entrainment is a term used to express how the human body assumes a sympathetic response to stimuli much the way scientists have discovered that two heart cells put together...
Pause, Breathe and Check In

Pause, Breathe and Check In

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinThich Nhat Hahn, a well- known author and Buddhist monk says we are reluctant to visit the home of our self because we are loath to face the pain, sadness and fear we might encounter there. It’s true those emotions are often...
Reality & Realist: An Idealist’s Perspective

Reality & Realist: An Idealist’s Perspective

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinWe give and receive negative behavior based in fear and doubt every day. That’s part of our humanness. Being an idealist in the face of this behavior doesn’t mean we act as if we’ve had a lobotomy or bury our heads...
I Want.  What Will I Do?

I Want. What Will I Do?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinWhat do I want and what am I willing to do? These are powerful questions that make up the internal dialog of those who have embraced intrinsic motivation; the process of identifying and expressing what one most loves. These are...
What & Why Emotional Intelligence

What & Why Emotional Intelligence

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinWe hear a lot of buzz these days about the importance of emotional intelligence (EI).  What exactly is “emotional intelligence” and why do we need it? There are 4 main components: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness...
Commitment

Commitment

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin“The moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves, too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all...
Am I Selfish?

Am I Selfish?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinIt’s important to ask, “What do I feel and what do I want?” When we neglect to take time to consider our choices we often commit self-betrayal, which then results in betrayal of others… A friend recently called me for advice....
What You Look For You Will Find

What You Look For You Will Find

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinOne of the great benefits and challenges of growing up is choice – consciously exercising it that is!  We are always choosing, we just don’t always ask ourselves what, how and why we are choosing.  Our focus makes all the...
Did You Hear What I Meant to Say?

Did You Hear What I Meant to Say?

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinHave you ever thought you had an agreement or understanding with someone only to find you didn’t? You thought you were clear and direct in a request, and ended up disappointed. Or have you responded to a request, only to find...
Dismantling Bullying Systems

Dismantling Bullying Systems

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedin(The story in this article may be an example involving students, but the message for the workplace is just as relevant) “As long as victims and bullies see themselves in diametrically opposed positions, (and they will if we...
Personal Power is Priceless

Personal Power is Priceless

Share this...FacebookTwitterLinkedinFeeling powerfully influential is a heady experience and one of our basic minimum human requirements for living a life of meaning. Authentic personal power developed in service to our highest purpose occurs when we know our...